Difficult to quit

Chapter 37 Chapter Remembrance

37

When the car drove to the basement, Li Qinghai drank a lot today and couldn't move Zhuang Yi. Xiao Chen and the driver supported Zhuang Yi together and put him on the bed at Li Qinghai's house.

Li Qinghai went to take a shower by himself, twisted a wet towel, and found that Zhuang Yi had gotten up again, squatting on his bed with his arms around his knees.

"What's the matter?" He was angry and funny, "drinking so much wine and still not sleeping?"

"I don't want to sleep," Zhuang Yi said, emphasizing: "I didn't drink too much."

"Well, I didn't drink much." Li Qinghai threw the towel on the bedside table casually, "If you don't want to sleep, don't sleep."

He went out of the bedroom to mix a glass of honey water and brought it in. Zhuang Yi was still squatting in that position, and when he saw him coming in, he asked, "Where have you been?"

"Pour you a glass of water." Seeing him like that, Li Qinghai was not sure if he could hold the water glass steadily, so he put the water glass on the bedside table.

"Where have you been?" Zhuang Yi ignored him, muttering to himself in a low voice, "Why didn't you come back?"

Li Qinghai paused, and the water cup made a crisp sound when it hit the cabinet.

He stood there for a while, then turned around and went to bed, sat down opposite Zhuang Yi, and said softly, "Are you sad after I leave?"

At this moment, Zhuang Yi pursed his lips tightly and did not speak.

"Little Zhuang Yi," Li Qinghai's alcohol began to surge, his stomach was burning like a pain, he closed his eyes, stretched out his hand to pinch the back of Zhuang Yi's neck, and asked him in a hoarse voice: "Do you want... want to Have you ever been?"

Zhuang Yi still didn't speak.

Although he was drunk, he was not delirious yet, and he knew that he would not tell Li Qinghai what he said.

It's not that I don't want to say it, but I want to say it too much. I once gritted my teeth and swallowed blood into my stomach, and then I never told anyone.

But there was a warm hand groping along the side of his waist, covering the scar on his lower back.

Li Qinghai put his arms around him, pressed it against his ear and asked, "Tell me, does it hurt?"

This sentence defeated Zhuang Yi's defense.

No one ever asked him if it hurt.

"It hurts," he said.

He can't say that liking a man is a taboo, it is abnormal and perverted in the eyes of others, and he can't tell anyone about it.

"It hurts so much." Zhuang Yi's voice was choked with sobs.

He no longer remembers how the rumors got out in the first place.

The classmates talked behind his back, saying that he was abnormal.

Then one day, Sun Wei dug out his diary while he was going to the bathroom, stood on the podium and read aloud to the whole class.

It was too late when Zhuang Yi came back. He tried desperately to grab the diary. The diary was torn from the spine, and the scattered papers were circulated in the class. When he snatched a page, there were more than a dozen pages read aloud by others. .

Zhuang Yi never wrote a diary after that day, but it was too late.

The whole class knew that he liked a man, and the two were often together, and when that man left, he missed him every day.

A spark bursts out, the news blows across the wilderness like wind, and in an instant it becomes a prairie fire.

At the beginning, people he didn't know came to see him at the door of the class, and he would be pointed at wherever he went.

Rumors are the scariest devil. Gradually, those comments became more and more dirty. Some said that he was not clean with men, some said that he liked that man and was scared away because of his perverted feelings, and some even said that he had seen him after school. I saw him get into the old man's car.

All kinds of filthy things were painted on his books, and garbage and bugs often appeared inexplicably in his schoolbag.

He didn't have many friends, and now he was even more lonely. After the textbook was torn up by the teacher, he began to be afraid of going to school, and his grades plummeted.

At this time, Zhuang's mother had quit her long-term business trip. Zhuang Yi begged his mother to transfer to the county school where his hometown is located. He thought he could breathe a sigh of relief, but unexpectedly met a student from No. [-] Middle School again, and the rumors spread again.

In the past, the reputations of Li Qinghai and Wang Meng from No. [-] Middle School were all over the place. At least no one dared to beat him. No one in the county junior high school knew Li Qinghai, and all kinds of bullying came back again.

Zhuang Yi suffered day after day of patience and finally learned to resist.

When he smashed the head of a boy who often poured chalk dust into his water glass, they turned around and said that he had an extreme personality, and he was indeed a perverted homosexual.

Zhuang Yi didn't care about anything at this time. He skipped class, fought with those who bullied him, gritted his teeth and endured it if he couldn't beat him, and resisted with all his strength when he seized the opportunity. He finally understood what Li Qinghai told him, just be tough If he resisted to the end, the other party would not dare to continue to bully him.

He imitated what Li Qinghai used to be like, smoking and drinking. These two things seemed to have a miraculous effect, which could make him calm down, as if that person was still by his side. I'm not that scared anymore.

In this way, he got into the senior high school entrance examination, and he entered a good high school with his foundation in the first and second grades of junior high school. He still had no friends and spent his days in a daze.

At this time, he had grown to 173, and he still insisted on running every day. His muscles and bones were well-proportioned and his appearance was handsome. On the first day of school, he was banned by the girls in the class, and some girls began to secretly put love letters on his desk.

At this time, Zhuang Yi found that he couldn't fall in love with girls anymore.

The rumors are still with him, but he is not afraid at this time, he is no longer the weak child before, if someone dares to bully him, he dares to knock out the opponent's front teeth.

As a result, he met Bai Qi in the second year of high school.

A man with dyed silver hair and a snake tattoo on his wrist. He is a fellow. He once met Li Qinghai teaching Zhuang Yi to play in the billiard hall. Li Qinghai, this time he fell in love with Zhuang Yi.

That was another nightmare for Zhuang Yi.

Bai Qi is a member of the mixed society, and his younger brothers are all seen in fights, leading others to chase and intercept Zhuang Yi, from the restraint at the beginning to the more unscrupulous later.

In the end, Bai Qi ran out of patience and led someone to block Zhuang Yi in the garbage dump. He sat on a stack of flattened cardboards, played with iron bars, and said casually: "Zhuang Yi, I have been playing with you for a month. I'm tired of crooked, let me make a choice for you today, you can either stand up on your own, and let you go in the future; or come over and lick my brother, and my brother will love you very much."

Zhuang Yi had already received a beating at this time, and his whole body hurt, but he knew he had to get up.

Bai Qi's little brother surrounded him, and kicked him back hard every time he was about to get up. After repeating this a dozen times, Bai Qi gave an impatient "tsk", stood up holding the iron bar, Shengsheng knocked off Zhuang Yi's right leg.

The entire garbage dump was filled with Zhuang Yi's screams.

Bai Qi put the knife across his body, and his tone was full of bloodthirsty excitement, "Zhuang Yi, Li Qinghai of the third middle school is not as powerful as me. If you can accompany him, why can't you accompany me? Why are you making yourself so difficult?"

At that time, Zhuang Yi hadn't heard the name "Li Qinghai" for a long time.

But listening to the ear is still soft and powerful.

He thought that if he couldn't get up, he would let Bai Qi play with him.

The thought made him sick.

What would Li Qinghai think if he found out?

His vision was blurred by blood, and a hoarse howl came out of his throat. Holding the knife on his back, he struggled to get up with all his strength.

The young man's face was bloodstained, and the mud was washed away by tears on his face. He showed an ugly and arrogant smile to Bai Qi, "If you want to play with me, you deserve it?!"

Everyone present was shocked by him, until the boy dragged his right leg step by step and left the garbage dump, no one stopped him.

Zhuang Yi fainted when he walked out of the garbage dump, and was sent to the hospital to lie down for more than a month. After that, Bai Qi never looked for him again, but he was ruined and could never go back to the previous road. up.

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Zhuang Yi held Li Qinghai's clothes tightly, as if he wanted to crush the fabric.

"Why don't you come back?" He asked him in a low voice, his voice choked.

Li Qinghai couldn't suppress the pain, and his heart was so painful that his whole body was trembling.

He said, "I'm sorry, I'm... sorry."

The memory was too painful for both of them to digest.

Zhuang Yi suddenly bit Li Qinghai's shoulder hard!

Li Qinghai hissed, and subconsciously wanted to hide, but held back again, but hugged him even tighter.

The taste of fresh blood rushed into his mouth, Zhuang Yi bit hard and decisively, full of hatred, as if he wanted to get back all the injuries he suffered in those years.

Until a drop of water dripped into his open neckline, winding along the back, leaving a cold touch.

Zhuang Yi just woke up like a dream, only then realized that Li Qinghai didn't resist at all.

He let go suddenly, trying to push him away, but Li Qinghai hugged him even tighter.

"Don't move." Li Qinghai's voice was completely hoarse, "Hold me for a while, you can bite me however you want, give me a hug for a while."

Zhuang Yi was held in his arms, tears and blood wet Li Qinghai's clothes.

Li Qinghai said in a low voice: "It's not that I won't come back. I'm at Li's house, and I want to come back to you when I become stronger."

"I don't want you, brother has never forgotten you..."

At the beginning, he left because he was afraid that Li Yan would attack Zhuang Yi; if he had known that Zhuang Yi would encounter these things after he left, he would rather never return to Li's house.

Zhuang Yi seemed to be tired from crying, or perhaps because of the strength of the wine, he fell asleep in his arms.

Li Qinghai wiped his face clean with a wet towel, helped him take off his jacket and trousers, hugged him in his arms, and fell asleep after a while.